Saturday, September 28, 2019

Should I make Safari®
my default browser?

—New York state, in a fit of incredible largess, no doubt meant to keep Andrew Cuomo in office, sent a check for about 500 smackaroos, a rebate of school taxes. It has something to do with the fact my school-district kept its annual budget-increase below some gumint-mandated percentage.
The check came over a week ago, and I was holding it for online deposit via my iPhone.
I did it before. Photograph the check, which saves a trip to the bank.
Online deposit supposedly takes 3-5 minutes, but I often don’t have that. I also don’t often do online deposit.
The other night five minutes opened up, so I logged into my bank — or tried.
I got my iPhone logged in, but then the bank wanted a “Secure Access-Code;” an extra security step I’m not familiar with.
Since when is a “Secure Access-Code” gonna keep some ne’re-do-well from cleaning out my account if they already stole my phone?
That access-code could come via e-mail or phone. I didn’t notice it said “SMS” (text).
-So far 10 minutes.
I checked my e-mail: there it was, so I cranked it in. No idea if I did it right — it’s not displayed = security concerns.
Stroke-survivors suffer mistypes. I can’t see if I mistyped if it’s not visible.
“Naughty-naughty! Try again, LOSER!” (GPS-lady or The Donald?)
By now their system was inundating me with e-mailed access-codes, but they weren’t in my e-mail yet.
So I tried the first access-code again; good for 30 minutes. NYET! (Probably replaced by a new access-code.)
-15 minutes.
I tried again, and it locked my account. “Change password!”
HUH? What does my password have to do with an access-code?
Changing my password blows two devices: my computer and my iPhone.
-20 minutes.
I gave up exasperated. Born in the wrong century, and had a stroke. What’s invalid is ME. Every time I attempt fiddling computer-logic I get utter madness.
Try again the next morning. Go to bed!
Next morning “Change password” means call the bank.
“Please hold during the silence:” BOOM-CHICKA-BOOM-CHICKA-BOOM-CHICKA-BOOM-CHICKA!
-30 minutes so far.
Finally me and the bank’s service-rep tried to “change password.” She ended up doing it herself. Their system was lobbing hairballs.
(I know, wrong century, etc.)
“Are you using Firefox?” she asked. “We’re having ‘issues’ with Firefox.”
“Don’t you mean ‘problems?’” I asked.
“Have another browser?” the girl asked. I fired up my Safari®, and attempted to copy/paste my bank’s web-address from Firefox.
NYET! “Type it manually, not copy/paste,” she said.
Finally I was logged into my bank via Safari with my new password.
-45 minutes.
“Ya know I coulda just driven to the bank to deposit this check.” (I finally said it.) “I’m going that way anyway = a five-minute diversion.
Except I also need to log in on my computer, since I do all my banking online, and your system locked me out.”
So how many passwords so far? At least five over the past two years.
“You and your vaunted security got me to bed past midnight last night, then blew walking my dog this morning.”
Don’t know if she heard that. My iPhone died and cut her off.
But I can log into my bank with both my computer and iPhone. And was able to online deposit that check, despite various hairballs.
I guess five minutes is an hour in techno-logic.
Site-by-site my Firefox falls to Safari. Must I join the Dark Side = Google Chrome?

• “Andrew Cuomo,” son of Mario Cuomo, is the current governor of New York.
• I had a stroke October 26th, 1993 from an undiagnosed heart-defect since repaired. I pretty much recovered. Just tiny detriments; I can pass for never having had a stroke.

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