New Keyboard

Yr Fthl Srvnt is finally back to the 20th century. I’m one of them drudges that prefers a full computer keyboard, instead of my laptop’s cramped apparition.
My laptop’s keyboard was driving me crazy. Mistypes galore!
Same with its track-pad. Every time I visit my ‘pyooter-guru I suggest he take over. “Here, you drive. I’m too spastic with that swipe-pad.”
I had a previous peripheral keyboard. It was left over from my ancient G4 tower. I spilled chocolate on it, gumming it up — and lunching it.
My mouse is 10-15 years old. A replacement of my original G4 mouse, which tanked.
“Track-pads,” I guess that’s what ya call ‘em, are supposedly the new paradigm. But they slow things down, as does that laptop keyboard. I’m faster with the old way of doing things.
So I go somewhere with my laptop. Do I take my peripherals or don’t I? Depends. If I’m flying I leave ‘em behind. Doomed to mistypes and slowness, but I get by.
I took my laptop to Fort Lauderdale a few months ago. Last time. I can use my iPhone to fiddle most computer functions: e-mail, etc.
But not the heavy stuff. I’m sure I could Photoshop with an iPhone. But my laptop would leave that iPhone behind.
Do them engineers at Apple have any clue? Compress everything into a tiny iPhone. Their virtual keyboard is insane. Thank goodness for voice-recognition, but I hafta edit out nasty language.
The new keyboard is from Walmart*, ordered online. I hafta get used to it, since I got used to my laptop. The new keyboard is not my ancient keyboard, which had more resistance under its keys. It drives like my laptop, i.e. breathe on it, and text enters.
It’s Macally, el-cheapo at $29.95. Supposedly identical to a Windows keyboard. Apple’s splat-key (“⌘”), is also the Windows key.
Funny, how Windoze became identical to Mac OS-X. My wife, gone six years, had a Windoze PC. Perhaps I coulda used her old keyboard, except it was identified as a Windows keyboard — it had a few different keys.
Mac-Shack, my computer place, had a Macally, but it lacked the two USB ports my new keyboard has. One of the USB ports on my laptop is inoperable, so I need a port for my mouse.
I coulda gone wireless, but a friend advised I’d need spare batteries.
So here I am banging away on this new Macally. I keep my distance, since breathing might enter erroneous text. Mistypes galore, which seem more frequent as I get older.

• Apple’s splat-key (“⌘”) is apparently a “Command” key. The Windows dubya key (“W”) is apparently identical. They probably do different things per Windoze versus MAC. (Blood has spilled over which is superior.)