“Git-R-Dunn”

So here I am serenely motoring west in the CR-V on the roundabout back-country road (Martin Road) we use to get to the vaunted Honeoye Falls MarketPlace supermarket Linda always patronizes.
MarketPlace is not actually in Honeoye Falls. It’s on the western fringe out along a glitz-strip populated by garish minimalls and abandoned bank-branches and colonoscopy places, one mall of which has yet to lease any space despite being brand-new at least 10 years.
Probably built by some REPUBLICAN fat-cat hoping to feed his Mercedes Jones at the expense of rural hicks. But the dreaded rural hicks won’t bow to his self-declared wisdom. (A similar corner is for sale across from Rochester-Thunder at the intersection of U.S. Route 15 and State Route 251. It’s an old house, and has been for sale as long as we’ve been out here — 17 years. Obviously it’s overpriced; some REPUBLICAN fat-cat is hoping to make a killing off the corner location. It begs for a minimart [or a colonoscopy clinic]; but so far no one has bitten.)
Must be our ISP.
I am going to get coleslaw mix and Ensure, as Linda had to abstain from going to the supermarket.
As I motor west I notice Granny slowly approaching from the other direction in her metallic powder-blue Ford Focus station-wagon.
About 200 yards away, her left-turn signal flicks on — she’s planning to turn left across my path onto a side-street.
At 100-150 yards away, she has time to turn left without cutting me off. I’m only doing about 40-45 mph.
(Sorry guys; not 152 mph. It’s a residential road with playing children and dogs. The speed-limit is 40 mph.)
Suddenly, “PRAAMP!”
A glowering intimidator is behind Granny in a towering Z71 4WD Chevy pickup with a chromed brushbar, and a greenish semi-opaque “Git-R-Dunn” visor decal at the top of the windshield.
Young macho-pup is bouncing up-and-down and madly thumping the steering-wheel.
Despite the commotion, Granny waits. She could have made her turn safely, followed by macho-pup, who could then cut me off.
Sorry guys — I didn’t think to look. Don’t know if it had a Dubya-sticker to go with its “lead, follow or get outta the way” license-plate surround, and Calvin peeing on the Ford oval in the rear window.

“The CR-V” is our 2003 Honda CR-V SUV.

“Linda” is my wife of nearly 40 years. She has lymphatic cancer. (It’s treatable.)

RE: “garish minimalls and abandoned bank-branches and colonoscopy places.......” My loudmouthed macho brother-in-Boston had a colonoscopy in a clinic in a minimall — mine was in a hospital. He loudly claims he did better.

RE: “Must be our ISP!” ISP equals Internet-Service-Provider; in our case RoadRunner via the cable. Last July my macho, blowhard brother-from-Boston visited, and set up a wireless Internet connection to my router. His Internet reception was spotty, so he loudly blamed our Internet-Service-Provider (ISP). Now anything untoward is due to my ISP.

RE: “Sorry guys; not 152 mph......” My brother-in-Delaware bragged that his turbocharged Volvo station-wagon was capable of 152 mph.

A “glowering intimidator” is a tailgater, named after Dale Earnhardt, deceased, the so-called “intimidator” of NASCAR fame, who used to tailgate race-leaders and bump them at speed until they let him by.

“Dubya-sticker” is a Bush-Cheney 2004 bumper-sticker. All insane traffic-moves seem to involve Bush-supporters. They seem to think they have the right.

“Calvin” is the nasty little boy in the Calvin & Hobbs cartoon.