Bing-bong-bing-bong-bing-bong-bing!

(FROM THE VAUNTED AIN’T-TECHNOLOGY-WONDERFUL FILE)

Last night (Thursday, November 1, 2007) Linda apparently plugged her fantabulous RAZR cellphone into the battery-charger before we went to bed.
I try to get the cellphones off the battery-charger before we go to bed, but since it appeared Linda had just plugged her’s in, I figured I’d keep it in and disconnect when I got up later.
I usually get up at least once at night to get a drink of orange-juice, and if a cellphone is on the charger in the kitchen, unplugging ain’t much. This wouldn’t be the first time.
So about 3 a.m. I wander into the kitchen, and Linda’s cellphone is lighting it up.
“Charge completed,” it says.
“Oh yeah,” I think; “unplug Linda’s cellphone. I probably don’t even need lights.”
So I unplug her cellphone, but it continues to stay lit.
“Uh-ohhhhh...... It’s coming on.”
“Bing-bong-bing-bong-bing-bong-bing!”
The onliest way to shut it off is flip it open and hit the on-off button.
So I flip it open.
Instead of Linda’s wallpaper-shot of our shed with its flowers I get a blank white screen that illuminates the entire kitchen.
NOW WHAT? Hit the on-off button and see what happens.
Will I hafta pull the battery? —Turn on the lights?
It shut off (it’s a miracle, Bobby).
Here I am placidly motoring down the Interstate in my fancy car engineered by Microsoft.
All-of-a-sudden the car dies, I nearly get rear-ended by a glowering Schwarzenegger wannabee in a giant Hummer, I pull over, and the hourglass appears on the dashboard display-screen. (My old IMAC at the mighty Mezz threw up the dreaded bomb.)
“Unpardonable-sin number 1014 — please reboot!”

“Linda” is my wife of nearly 40 years.

RE: “It’s a miracle, Bobby” is something my mother always said to me regarding anything explainable — especially if she wanted it. My mother was a devout Christian. Like Falwell, she claimed she could turn hurricanes away in the Atlantic. “Not my granddaughter! Go intrude on somebody else’s wedding, like in North Carolina.”

RE: “Engineered by Microsoft......” All my siblings use PCs, but I use a MAC, so am therefore reprehensible.

The “mighty Mezz” is the Canandaigua Daily-Messenger newspaper, from where I retired almost two years ago. Best job I ever had.