No 89-bazilyun “friends”

The other day I happened to fire up my Facebook, which I hardly ever look at.
Six people I didn’t know were staring at me in Facebook “friend” invitations atop my page.
I was so flummoxed I wrote the following “status-update.”
(Facebook calls ‘em “status-updates.”)
“I see SIX (count ‘em, six) people I’m supposed to Facebook friend.
WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE? I don’t know a single one.
FB is claiming they are friends of people I’ve ‘friended.’
47 “friends” is enough. I don’t want thousands.
My aunt has only one friend, my brother who set her up.
Another guy I graduated college with has no FB ‘friends’ at all. He refuses to join Facebook.
I’d dive myself, but what-the-Hell?”
Apparently these status-updates go out to whatever Facebook “friends” I have.
One, a cousin down near Washington DC, responded as follows:
“It's best to keep the ‘friend list’ to relatives, or those friends from work, school, or your neighborhood that you actually know, or to additional people with whom you share a clear and unequivocal interest that may have developed ‘virtually’ (that is, from an on-line ‘community’). ‘Friends of Friends (and their friends and their friends)’ could lead to what Carl Sagan spoke of: ‘billions and billions.’ Billions of what? Names? Faces? Cat videos? That may be Zuckerberg's ultimate goal. Not mine.”
Apparently the friend-invites are “friends” of people I’ve “friended.” One looked like someone from Transit, and I’m “friends” with a few Transit retirees.
I know none of the others, like they may be “friends” with people who happen to be my “friends.”
Like I should be “friends” with someone I don’t know, just because they are “friends” with people I do know.
I don’t know what Facebook thinks, but one’s self-worth is not a function of how many Facebook “friends” one has.
I know some who have thousands of “friends;” not this kid.
My 84-year-old aunt has only one friend, my brother who set her up.
I’ve always been put off by Facebook; I put up with it.
Sickening ads that were obviously targeted, and once it froze my computer — it hasn’t recently.
Plus it’s always rolling out a new user-interface — I gotta spend hours trying the figger it out.
It also can be ridiculous. 89-bazilyun “congrats.”
I hardly look at it because it’s usually turgidly boring.
I’d shut down my Facebook, if I could see a way.
My sister died about three years ago, yet her Facebook rumbles on. My wife died two-and-a-half years ago, yet still has a Facebook. My friend Dan Gnagy died, but still has a Facebook.
What’s wrong with e-mail? Well, it can’t crunch a cat-video like Facebook can. It’s 20th century.
I keep my Facebook because many of my REAL friends use Facebook to communicate.

• “Transit” equals Regional Transit Service, the public transit-bus operator in Rochester, NY, where I drove transit-bus for 16&1/2 years (1977-1993). My stroke October 26, 1993 ended that. I retired on medical-disability. I recovered fairly well.