“Huh?”

Screenshot with the mighty MAC

“Huh?”

Last Saturday night (April 18, 2009) I decided to attempt to reconcile our credit-card account, an endeavor made impossible because of recent bank shenanigans prompted by our account being stolen.
At the end of last year, the bank froze our account because of unauthorized charges, closed our old account, and opened a new one.
Their loss was only a couple bucks, but they never told us exactly what legitimate charges were transferred to our new account.
In attempting to reconcile the new account a few weeks later, it was apparent nearly all, but not all, the legitimate charges to our old account had been transferred.
I reconcile the account because years ago I worked at a bank, and I know how it is.
The correctness of bank processing is a direct function of the size of your bank balance.
Years ago a vice-president of Xerox used to bounce checks willy-nilly on his checking account, and the bank manager cleared ‘em for fear of losing his business.
What this was, was an interest-free loan.
Let small potatoes muck up, and the bank went ballistic.
Years ago the bank lost my Transit paycheck (which had been deposited to our checking account), and all-of-a-sudden they started bouncing our checks.
I had to do a grandstand.
I had a receipt, and they could just put that money in our account, and I wasn’t leaving until they did.
I.e. it wasn’t my fault the bank had lost my paycheck.
—1) “So you balance your account?” my old friend Frank Brown at the mighty Mezz said to me once.
“To the penny?” he asked.
“You better believe it,” I said. “And they better not muck up. I worked for a bank.”
—2) “So what do you think of Canandaigua National Bank?” a guy who had just trimmed our trees asked last week.
He’s trying to start a lawncare business.
“Well, so far so good,” I said. “They better not muck up, or they’re gonna hear it.”
My account software is Quicken 2003, an antique, but fine for what I do.
Reconciling is a Quicken function, just reconciling ‘pyooter records with the bank’s monthly statement.
True to form, Quicken throws an alarm about a previous reconciliation, as has been the case ever since the steal and shenanigans.
Do I wanna adjust? No.......
I don’t want some fudge-factor screwing up everything I do.
If I use the bank’s starting balance, and check off each charge (and credit), I should end up with their new balance — the balance I owe.
Which is the whole point of reconciliation.
The fact Quicken and the bank don’t agree on the starting balance is irksome but irrelevant.
I can’t make them agree without knowing -a) exactly what the bank transferred, and -b) what they ate. —It seems they ate a legitimate charge or two.
So here I am reconciling the account, and I’m presented with the curious statement pictured.
I crank the beginning statement balance, and the ending balance, into my Quicken reconciliation window, and I get figures different than what I put in.
Some mystery is going on in the background.
Beyond that, the picture displayed makes no sense — except to a REPUBLICAN.
Bellicose Conservatives are mailing teabags to Obama, but it was their guy who blew the deficit outta sight.

RE: “The mighty MAC......” —All my siblings use Windows PCs, but I use an Apple MacIntosh, so am therefore reprehensible and stupid.

“Our” is my wife of 41+ years, “Linda,” and I.

“Transit” equals Regional Transit Service, the transit-bus operator in Rochester, NY, where I drove transit-bus for 16&1/2 years (1977-1993). My stroke October 26, 1993 ended that.

The “mighty Mezz” is the Canandaigua Daily-Messenger newspaper, from where I retired over three years ago. Best job I ever had. Frank Brown had once been my boss.

“Canandaigua National Bank” has our checking-account and safe-deposit box. (It’s the only independent bank in the area.)

“Quicken 2003” is a personal accounting computer software application; the 2003 iteration.

“‘Pyooter” is computer.

My siblings are all tub-thumping Conservative Republicans, but I’m not, so am therefore of-the-Devil.