Pickle-face

I’m not the prez, but I think I’d share my umbrella with my wife.

—“I’ll tell ya what I most dislike about The Donald.”
I said that Saturday to one of my female lifeguard friends at the Canandaigua YMCA swimming-pool, who I somehow got started on an anti-Trump rant.
“It’s the way he thinks of women as mere toys, trophies.”
She twisted her face into an exaggerated grimace, what a friend calls the “pickle-face.”
I don’t know how Melania can stay with that guy,” she said. “No way could I share a bed with such a creep!”
“Melania sleeps alone,” I cried. “As does The Donald, except for his 3 a.m. Tweets from the Great White Throne.
I made too many female friends,” I added; “and you’re one of them.”
I avoid politics and religion in these blogs. It’s a good way to lose friends.
But a pickle-face is blog-material.
“The last thing I said to my wife as I drove her to hospice was ‘You always had what matters — what’s between the ears’.”
“A brain,” my lifeguard friend commented.
“My cousin in NC always turns down the TV when Trump comes on.”
“So do I,” exclaimed my lifeguard friend. “I can’t stand him! 9.5 minutes for Obama to announce the death of bin Laden, 48 minutes of self-congratulatory blathering regarding the death of al-Baghdadi.”
“As you know,” I added; “I once worked for the Messenger newspaper. I’m a word-guy.”
She used the word “minions” to describe Trump’s subordinates.
“I call ‘em ‘lackeys’,” I told her.
There goes Donald across the White House lawn to Marine One. It’s raining, and he has the presidential umbrella over his head, but not Melania. (See screenshot above.)
But some lackey extended the umbrella out over Melania with a Sharpie.
“Just like Alabama,” my lifeguard friend said.
“How many people understand that Alabama/Sharpie bit?” I asked.
“Well I sure do,” she said. “It makes us look so bad it’s depressing. How long do we hafta put up with this guy?
The poster-boy for everything CONSERVATISM supposedly stands against.”
He’ll probably be re-elected by turning off most voters.
Then declare himself president-for-life. Toss the Constitution!
Another friend worries about Trumpsters starting a civil war.

• I retired from the Canandaigua Daily-Messenger newspaper almost 14 years ago. The BEST job I ever had. (“Canandaigua” is a small city nearby where I live in Western NY. The city is also within a rural town called “Canandaigua.” The name is Indian, and means “Chosen Spot.” —It’s about 14 miles away.)