Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Mexican standoff

Yesterday (Monday, March 5, 2012) I had to patronize the Mighty Tops supermarket in Canandaigua after working out at the YMCA.
So northward on the main drag I motored toward Mighty Tops.
The main drag eventually intersects North Road, and Tops is in the northwest corner.
So I must turn left onto North Road. There is a dedicated left-turn lane, but it’s not a stop-light. It’s not busy enough.
If opposing traffic presents an opening, you can turn left.
An opening presented itself, so I turned left, followed by a glowering intimidator right on my rear bumper.
As I completed my turn and started accelerating down North Road, Mr. Intimidator rendered a hand-motion that I should get moving.
The entrance to Tops is perhaps 200 feet from the intersection, and turns right.
Signaled, I made the turn in, and waved a hearty hello to Mr. Intimidator.
Mr. Intimidator followed me right into Tops.
“Uh-ohhhhh......” I thought to myself.
Possible Mexican standoff coming!
It didn’t happen. Mr. Intimidator disappeared and parked somewhere else.
I walked inside Mighty Tops, expecting Mr. Intimidator to greet me.
That didn’t happen either, but if it had I would have smiled and said “Oh, was that you back there climbing all over my rear bumper?
As a Transit bus-driver I learned to look out for drivers like you, the NASCAR wannabees and frenzied flunkies that feel entitled to drive with no regard whatsoever for the other guy.
People that cut me off, follow too close, make agitated cellphone calls to mother to complain about their marriage-partner, or fiddle Facebook.
So hit me with your best shot! My SmartPhone is right here in my back pocket, and I’ll dial 9-1-1 and get the police up here right away.
In fact, perhaps I should call the police up here right now.
Get your license so the police can arrest you for assault, even if that hasn’t happened yet.
Stoop to the level of Limbaugh — facts don’t matter; in fact they’re an impediment.
Road-rage on the local evening TV-news.
See me in court, Mr. Intimidator!”

• “Tops” is a large supermarket-chain based in Buffalo we occasionally buy groceries at. They have a store in Canandaigua.
• “Canandaigua” (“cannan-DAY-gwuh”) is a small city nearby where we live in Western NY. The city is also within a rural town called “Canandaigua.” The name is Indian, and means “Chosen Spot.” It’s about 14 miles away. —We live in the small rural town of West Bloomfield, southeast of Rochester.
• I work out in the Canandaigua YMCA Exercise-Gym, appropriately named the “Wellness-Center,” usually three days per week, about two-three hours per visit.
• A “glowering intimidator” is a tailgater, named after Dale Earnhardt, deceased, the so-called “intimidator” of NASCAR fame, who used to tailgate race-leaders and bump them at speed until they let him pass.
• For 16&1/2 years (1977-1993) I drove transit bus for Regional Transit Service (RTS) in Rochester, NY, a public employer, the transit-bus operator in Rochester and its environs. My stroke October 26, 1993 ended that. I retired on medical-disability.

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