Order out of chaos!
“Welcome to Tops! If you have a Tops favored-customer card, please scan it now.”
“BIP!”
“Welcome, Tops favored customer!”
Far as I know, Tops is the onliest supermarket in this area with U-scan. Weggers doesn’t have it; nor does MarketPlace in Honeoye Falls.
Wal*Mart may have it, but I don’t patronize Wal*Mart. -A) Too inconvenient, and -B) I got snapped at by store-associates because I had the awful temerity and unmitigated gall and horrific audacity to interrupt their day-long donut-break to ask where something was.
There also was being kissed by a foul-smelling greeter.
I’ve had success with the U-scan sometimes, but not always.
I’m wrastlin’ that sucker into submission if it’s the last thing I do.
“Please scan first item.”
“BIP!”
“Please place scanned item in plastic grocery bag that clutters landfill 700 years.”
“Oh no ya don’t! I’m beatin’ your system. I’m usin’ my reusable canvas shopping bag I hafta hose out with bleach after each use lest it impregnate my canned goods with deadly toxins.
I’ll just put everything on your silly scale that registers each increase to allow me to continue.
There’s not very much. I’ll just transfer everything to my reusable shopping bag when I’m done.”
Amazing; I actually got past my Tops favored-customer keytag. Often that doesn’t scan.
Bip! Bip! Bip! Bip! Incredible mindbending progress. We’re successfully scanning the entire order — maybe seven items.
Only one item remains: four peaches.
“Produce?”
“BIP!”
“Please key in the produce-code from the sticker, or hit ‘no produce-code.’
Please place item in bag that clutters landfill 700 years.”
“Uh-ohhhh........ Sounds like it priced that first peach before I got the others on the scale.”
Engage guile-and-cunning.
“Produce?”
“BIP!”
“Please key in the produce-code; blah-blah-blah.”
Place remaining peaches on scale before keying in code.
“Please place item in bag that clutters landfill 700 years.
Do you have any coupons?”
“BIP!”
“Please scan coupons and place in drop-slot on front of this unit.”
“Where? I don’t see any drop-slot.
Oh, there it is. It’s well hidden.”
“Select method of payment.”
“BIP!”
Holy mackerel. It looks like I’m actually gonna succeed for once.
“Please collect all your items and visit attendant station to sign your charge-slip.”
Order out of chaos!
• “Tops” is a large supermarket-chain based in Buffalo we occasionally buy groceries at. They have a store in Canandaigua.
• “Weggers” is Wegmans, a large supermarket-chain based in Rochester we often buy groceries at. They have a store in Canandaigua.
• “MarketPlace” is an independent supermarket in the small nearby village of Honeoye Falls.
•“Honeoye (‘HONE-eee-oy’) Falls” is the nearest town to where we live in western New York, a rural town about five miles away.
“BIP!”
“Welcome, Tops favored customer!”
Far as I know, Tops is the onliest supermarket in this area with U-scan. Weggers doesn’t have it; nor does MarketPlace in Honeoye Falls.
Wal*Mart may have it, but I don’t patronize Wal*Mart. -A) Too inconvenient, and -B) I got snapped at by store-associates because I had the awful temerity and unmitigated gall and horrific audacity to interrupt their day-long donut-break to ask where something was.
There also was being kissed by a foul-smelling greeter.
I’ve had success with the U-scan sometimes, but not always.
I’m wrastlin’ that sucker into submission if it’s the last thing I do.
“Please scan first item.”
“BIP!”
“Please place scanned item in plastic grocery bag that clutters landfill 700 years.”
“Oh no ya don’t! I’m beatin’ your system. I’m usin’ my reusable canvas shopping bag I hafta hose out with bleach after each use lest it impregnate my canned goods with deadly toxins.
I’ll just put everything on your silly scale that registers each increase to allow me to continue.
There’s not very much. I’ll just transfer everything to my reusable shopping bag when I’m done.”
Amazing; I actually got past my Tops favored-customer keytag. Often that doesn’t scan.
Bip! Bip! Bip! Bip! Incredible mindbending progress. We’re successfully scanning the entire order — maybe seven items.
Only one item remains: four peaches.
“Produce?”
“BIP!”
“Please key in the produce-code from the sticker, or hit ‘no produce-code.’
Please place item in bag that clutters landfill 700 years.”
“Uh-ohhhh........ Sounds like it priced that first peach before I got the others on the scale.”
Engage guile-and-cunning.
“Produce?”
“BIP!”
“Please key in the produce-code; blah-blah-blah.”
Place remaining peaches on scale before keying in code.
“Please place item in bag that clutters landfill 700 years.
Do you have any coupons?”
“BIP!”
“Please scan coupons and place in drop-slot on front of this unit.”
“Where? I don’t see any drop-slot.
Oh, there it is. It’s well hidden.”
“Select method of payment.”
“BIP!”
Holy mackerel. It looks like I’m actually gonna succeed for once.
“Please collect all your items and visit attendant station to sign your charge-slip.”
Order out of chaos!
• “Tops” is a large supermarket-chain based in Buffalo we occasionally buy groceries at. They have a store in Canandaigua.
• “Weggers” is Wegmans, a large supermarket-chain based in Rochester we often buy groceries at. They have a store in Canandaigua.
• “MarketPlace” is an independent supermarket in the small nearby village of Honeoye Falls.
•“Honeoye (‘HONE-eee-oy’) Falls” is the nearest town to where we live in western New York, a rural town about five miles away.
posted by BobbaLew at 10:36 AM
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