Ringtone

Last night (Monday, June 15, 2009), at long last, I managed to change the ringtone on my new Nokia 6205 cellphone.
I’ve had it almost a month, and the default Verizon ringtone was irksome, unbearable.
It sounded like that electronic rap background music in the Geico commercials, where the thin pile of wrapped money stares google-eyed.
Menu — tools — sounds — ringtone.
89 bazilyun possible ringtones are presented, and I found “play.”
Every single one was abominable; Beethoven’s Ode to Joy through Dolly Parton.
I know a cellphone is now a technological wonder, but to me it’s just a phone.
Nice that it frees me from the landline network, but I don’t time-travel, so I don’t need to start my dinner from across the universe.
All I want it to do is ring; not play “Ride of the Valkyries.”
I avoided “Single Beep,” because I don’t want it ringing only once.
But “Single Beep” was the only ringtone that wasn’t plinka-planka-plunka.
Test time: set ringtone to Single-Beep, and try calling my phone.
“Be-beep; be-beep; be-beep; be-beep!”
That’s more like it. I guess “Single Beep” is only for playback. As an actual ringtone, it rings like a telephone.
Not some electronic butchering of the Mozart horn concerto.
It’s not the ringtone I’d like to have, which is an MP3 of Nickel Plate steam-locomotive #765, whistling for a road-crossing.
Verizon, in its infinite wisdom, won’t let me use a foreign MP3 as my ringtone.
Has to be a Verizon ringtone.
There’s already all them silly ringtones preloaded on my cellphone. Plus a slew more you have to download to play.
Two years ago, while traveling with a group of railfans to an excursion in PA, I noticed they all had the General-Electric locomotive airhorn as ringtones on their cellphone.
“Pramp-pramp. Pramp-PRAMP!”
Since they all had the same ringtone, they never knew who’s phone was ringing.
But Verizon won’t let me load that.
When Linda and I both had RAZRs®, we never knew who’s phone was ringing.

“Verizon™” is our cellphone service provider.

“Nickel Plate steam-locomotive #765” is a restored Nickel Plate railroad-locomotive that operates in excursion service. It is the best extant, and has a gorgeous-sounding locomotive whistle. (“Nickel Plate” is the New York, Chicago & St. Louis Railroad, called the “Nickel Plate” long ago by a New York Central executive because it was so competitive. The railroad eventually renamed itself the “Nickel Plate.” Norfolk & Western Railroad bought the Nickel Plate years ago, and N&W has since merged with Southern Railway, to become Norfolk Southern. Nickel Plate never actually attained New York city; it stopped at Buffalo.)

A “road-crossing” is where a railroad crosses a highway at the same grade. —An approaching train must signal its approach; locomotive air-horn or steam-locomotive whistle. The standard grade-crossing signal is two longs, a short, and then a long. (“Pramp-pramp. Pramp-PRAMP!”)

I’ve been a railfan all my life.

General-Electric manufactures diesel-electric railroad locomotives in Erie, PA. They have become a major marketing success.

“Linda” is my wife of 41+ years.

We both had Motorola RAZR® cellphones. —She still has hers, but mine got dunked, and had to be replaced.