Bigga-Bazoomza

Taste and decorum here! I cropped out pretty *****’s face, so she’s not stalked by some drooling ne’er-do-well geezer.

—Facebook, in its infinite all-knowing wisdom, has apparently decided I should get acres and acres of deep, dark cleavage.
UHMMM; yer barking up the wrong tree Mark.
Facebook is hurling lots of buxom honeys, all completely unknown to me, as “friend” suggestions.
Two so far; one being the bottom picture, blogged as truckstop candy.
Second is some pretty young cutie-pie who wasn’t able to finish her dress. “In a relationship,” it says.
The top picture is supposedly not Facebook — it was only e-mail.
Somehow it got past my two spam detectors, and ended up as a valid e-mail.
I opened it, and was immediately swamped by bigga-bazooms.
***** is cute, but them bigga-bazooms would be a distraction.
How ya supposed to enjoy the company of a lady if ya can’t even breathe?
Sex is not what’s important to this dude. What matters is “can we talk?”
Talk-talk-talk-talk; that’s where the pleasure is.
How can you talk smothered in bigga-bazooms? How can you talk with bigga-bazooms distracting you?
Most of my lady-friends are nowhere near as well-endowed as the ladies pictured.
They have what matters, their smile or eyes are ravishing.
A couple weeks ago I Googled a song my long-ago rock ’n’ roll band — high-school — played as a girl sang. It was “Scotch and Soda,” by the Kingston Trio, back in 1958.
It had a fabulous line in its lyrics: “All I need is one of your smiles, sunshine of your eyes, oh, me, oh, my…..”
There it is, readers! Every one of my lady-friends has done that to me over the past few months, and many are flat-as-a-board. (Well, maybe not “flat-as-a-board,” but no bigga-bazooms.)
When that lady smiles at me I am smitten.
It’s my past of course = “no pretty lady will smile you!”
Every time I read that “Scotch and Soda” line I tear up.
Some pretty lady smiling at me counters 70+ years of thinking “no pretty lady will have anything to do with you!”

More taste and decorum! I cropped out pretty *****’s face so she too wouldn’t be stalked by slobbering geezers. (She’s pretty, but I seen prettier.)

• “Mark” is Mark Zuckerberg, head honcho of Facebook.