Nothing over $80,000!

Are they kidding?
This is as laughable as the four-hour erections in the Cialis ads.
(Ever wonder if there’s any water in them bathtubs?)
So says the cover of my January 2012 issue of Car&Driver magazine, detailing the 10 best cars for 2012.
Okay, the Ford Focus is $17,295-to-$23,495, the Honda Fit is $15,945-to-$17,680, and the Mazda MX-5 Miata is $23,985-to-$29,455.
But the Audi (“OW-dee;” as in “wow”) A6/A7 3.0T Quattro is $50,775-to-$60,125, and the BMW 3-Series/M3 is $38,125-to-$71,125.
Even the Boss 302 Mustang is $38,105-to-$48,100, and the CTS-V Cadillac is $65,390.
The Honda Accord, perhaps the car best-suited to American driving conditions, is $22,150-to-$28,325, and the Volkswagen GTI (I had an ’83) is $18,765-to-$25,465. (My ’83 cost nowhere near that.)
The Porsche (“POOR-sha”) Boxter is $49,050-to-$67,250.
So much for the Boxter. Lust-able, but at that price, you’ve lost me.
These prices are stratospheric.
And so it goes. Inflation ratcheting up the price of transportation.
I remember when I bought our 2005 Toyota Sienna van six years ago, I gulped at the $30,000 I forked over.
To replace it would probably take 40,000 buckaroos.
Beyond that, I’ve become my paternal grandmother.
Most important is a car start, and run reliably.
Performance, what Car&Driver is trumpeting, is frivolous stuck in traffic, which is a lotta the time.
The Honda Fit is a great car, but $16,000 is a lot of money for basic transportation, no matter how inspired it is.
And as appealing as the Boxter might be, I might be able to appropriately enjoy it about one percent of the time.

1968 Triumph TR250 (same color as mine).

Mine was red with a black stripe.

We had a Triumph sportscar once. It was totally unsuited for basic transportation.
We replaced it with a Chevrolet Vega GT, much better-suited to basic transportation, yet still enjoyable.
The Vega GT didn’t set me back $30,000. In fact, the Triumph cost $4,500 brand-new, a fortune at that time.
Cars are of course better nowadays.
Our Sienna isn’t washed up at only six years.
In fact, it seems new.
Our Honda CR-V is eight years old, but not showing its age. Only that it’s out-of-date.
My Triumph was done at six years.
But $16,000 or more for basic transportation?
Go back far enough, and basic transportation cost around $500.
When my father was raised to $100 a week in 1949 it was a major stride forward.
And a $12,000 annual salary offer in 1956 was a giant leap.
My wife always says we did fine under inflation, but I don’t know.
The price of basic transportation climbs ever higher.

• The “CR-V” is our 2003 Honda CR-V SUV.