It’s all about intimidation, baby!

I hear tell an important football game was played yesterday (Sunday, February 6, 2011).
As has been the case for years, we didn’t watch.
In fact, we didn’t even try.
We have in the past, but after about five-to-10 minutes it becomes just another football game, excruciating boring.
Almost as boring as golf, or as a friend said, the Tour de France.
“Are they done pedaling yet?” she’d ask. “Pedal-pedal-pedal-pedal.”
Football seems to be an all-American celebration of mayhem and madness.
Like this is what would happen to Osama bin Laden, if we could just find him.
Giant thugs smashing each other.
The goal is to sack, or protect, the quarterback.
I still have the image of a defensive player strutting around doing a “hee-yah” Viking victory-dance.
He had just sacked the quarterback.
With any luck the sacking will be so hurtful the quarterback will have to be removed from the field on a stretcher.
Like with a traumatic brain-injury, or at least a concussion.
The thugs think they are above the law, and can rape and pillage with abandon.
I suppose if you played football in high-school or college, professional football would be interesting — like to score touchdowns despite all the mayhem and madness.
I hear this game was won by the Green Bay Packers.
I didn’t know who to root for.
On the one hand I had a really great girlfriend in high-school originally from Pittsburgh, so I was for the Steelers.
On the other hand, Green Bay is a small-town community-owned football team.
Plus the Steelers had already won six championships.
But I couldn’t get interested.
Too many distractions, like the Internet and e-mail.
A friend who played ice-hockey had it best: “It’s all about intimidation, baby!”
Turning your opponent into a cowering wuss.
Zippity-doo.
“Here, see this stick, kid? Ya smash it over the head of your opponent.”
And a lineman, having just sacked the opposing team’s quarterback, gets to strut around in a “hee-yah” Viking victory-dance.