“Construction-Vehicle: Do Not Follow”

So here I am merrily navigating west on 5&20, returning from mighty Weggers.
I get stopped at Toomey’s Corners, a traffic-light, the intersection of State Route 64 and 5&20.
At Toomey’s Corners, 5&20 widens out to four lanes, so that people can turn right without impeding traffic, or those going straight can go around anyone turning left.
I’m stopped in the left-most lane, the place to stop if no one’s turning left.
All of a sudden a large dump-truck sweeps by on my right, and then moves left where 5&20 goes back to two lanes.
An illegal move — it’s called passing on the right — a county-mounty could pull ya over.
But it’s happened often enough I more-or-less expect it. Once I had to open up the LHMB when a tiny Honda-car tried to do that.
But “Git-R-Dun” and “I voted for Dubya.” “Traffic-law is for wusses — an impediment to my forward progress.” (Once a Ford Fiesta passed me on the sidewalk — I was a good boy; on-the-road.)
The traffic-light was changing when the dump-truck swept by, so I found myself following a large foul-smelling truck with an large orange “Construction-Vehicle: Do Not Follow” sign on the back.
These are the situations that drive Linda crazy. “Now what? The most efficient way to get home is to follow a truck with a ‘Do Not Follow’ sign. What am I supposed to do? Take another route? Arrow into the adjacent pasture?”
So I followed the “Do Not Follow” vehicle home — in utter defiance of the sign.

“5&20” is the main east-west road through our area; State Route 5 and U.S. Route 20, both on the same road. 5&20 is just south of where we live.

“Mighty Weggers” is Wegmans, a large supermarket-chain based in Rochester we often buy groceries at. They have a store in Canandaigua.

“LHMB” is my 2003 Honda 600-cc CBR/RR crotch-rocket motorcycle. Seeing a picture of it, my sister-in-Floridy declared “Lord-Have-Mercy;” and my loudmouthed brother-in-Boston, a macho Harley-guy, seeing it was yellow, pronounced it a “Banana.” So LHMB equals Lord-Have-Mercy-Banana.

“Dubya” is George W. Bush.

“Linda” is my wife of nearly 40 years. She’s “automotively-challenged.”